if i die i would not have to feel like this and all my pain will go away i would not have to worry abut keeping people happy and i would not have to yell at people just so they will listen to me and i will not have feel like i’m in a cage i will never have to fake a smile aging i will not have worry about having a anxiety attack ever aging well cuz i would be dead
After the break up with my b/f of 14yrs I thought the sadness had gone when I figured out...
Ａ ｓｔｏｒｍ ｗａｓ ｃｌｏｓｉｎｇ ｉｎ， ａｓ Ｉ ｗａｓ ｔｒｙｉｎｇ ｔｏ ｇｅｔ ｈｏｍｅ． Ｉ ｄｏｎ’ｔ ｋｎｏｗ ｗｈａｔ Ｉ’ｖｅ ｄｏｎｅ ｔｏ ｔｈｅ ｆｏｎｔ， ｏｒ ｈｏｗ ｔｏ ｕｎｄｏ ｉｔ ａｔ ｔｈｅ ｍｏｍｅｎｔ － ａｌｌ ａｐｏｌｏｇｉｅｓ， ｈａｈａ， Ｉ ａｍ ｓｔｕｃｋ ｕｓｉｎｇ ｔｈｅ ｇｕｐｐy (a little netbook) ｔｏ ｂｌｏｇ， ｂｅｃａｕｓｅ ｍｙ ｐｃ ｉｓ ｓｔｉｌｌ ｄｏｗｎ （ｐｅｎｄｉｎｇ ｃｅｒｔａｉｎ ａｔｔｅｍｐｔｓ ｔｏｏ ｆｉｘ ｉｔ － Ｉ ｉｎｔｅｎｄ ｔｏ ｄｅａｌ ｗｉｔｈ ｉｔ， ａｆｔｅｒ ｔｈｅ ｓｔｏｒｍ ｐａｓｓｅｓ， ｗｈｅｎ Ｉ ｃａｎ ｐｌｕｇ ｉｔ ｂａｃｋ ｉｎ． Ｔｈｅ ｅｌｅｃｔｒｉｃａｌ ｓｔｏｒｍｓ ａｒｏｕｎｄ ｈｅｒｅ ａｒｅ ｓｏ ｂａｄ， Ｉ ｗｏｎ’ｔ ｃｈａｎｃｅ ｌｅａｖｉｎｇ ｉｔ ｐｌｕｇｇｅｄ ｉｎ， ａｎｄ ｅｖｅｒｙｔｈｉｎｇ Ｉ ｈａｖｅ ｔｏ ｄｏ ｗｉｌｌ ｔａｋｅ ｔｏ ｌｏｎｇ ｔｏ ｒｅｌｙ ｏｎ ｔｈｅ ｂａｔｔｅｒｙ － ｔｈｅ ｔｈｉｎｇ ｉｓ ｆｕｎｃｔｉｏｎｉｎｇ ｉｎ ｓｌｏｗ ｍｏｔｉｏｎ， ａｓ ｉｓ． Ｃｈａｒｌｉｅ ｓｅｅｍｅｄ ａｎｎｏｙｅｄ ｔｈａｔ Ｉ ｗａｓ ｔｙｐｉｎｇ ａｗａｙ － ｈｅ’ｓ ｎｏｗ ｏｎ ｔｈｅ ｂａｃｋ ｐｏｒｃｈ， ｓｍｏｋｉｎｇ， ａｎｄ ｐｅｒｈａｐｓ， ｐｏｕｔｉｎｇ． Ｈａｄ ａ ｎｉｃｅ ｂｒｅａｋｆａｓｔ， ｂｕt (haha, and I don’t know how I fixed the font, either.) I can...
Here I am, twenty-something years later, still wondering why I am never good enough. At this point, I doubt...
Sorry that I'm not sending out graphics today friends, I'm just tired and have a lot to get done....
How people see me: Sad up going Blank in control enjoying life How I actually feel: Lost alone broken...
Well today was oddly depressing. Usually my days are just emotionless blurs with the occasional showering of anger, despair...
I hate that mother says I have no choice, about having the parasites(my sister and er son) live in...
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To quote crip Mac, never commit suicide. Eventually you’ll bump into a person who just listens. Life is constant pain, I’m not going to pretend you’ll be in a moment where it just disappears, but it will subside. Then you’ll have interesting new pains to grapple with!
It gets easier somehow, and that constant pain is in service of the little joys you can’t feel right now, but you and I know they’re there every day too.
We just need to find a way to lock on that part of our day, or maybe that’s escapism and also unhealthy, eh.