If you cry wolf, then of course no one is going to help you when you really need it.

I may not keep this blog up long because I already have a feeling it may cause conflict. But here goes..

People come into chat and expect us to be able to fix them. We are just people, the same as you, the same as everyone here. We all suffer. The chat room is a tool, a supportive group there to hold each other up when the times are bad. We all do this to the best of our ability, but when individuals come in expecting us to fix them, expecting a certain amount of support and they don't get it – which in itself could be because of varying reasons; these individuals attack 'chat', and by doing so i don't think they realise they are attacking each invidividual in it. I'm not even sure that makes sense, I'm struggling to explain my annoyance.

I think, basically, certain people cry wolf. And we are after all, only human, there is only so much repetativeness any of us can handle. After that, we shut down – we all have our own problems, but some of us choose not to voice them constantly. I'm not saying there is anything wrong with being vocal about issues, not at all, but at the same time, it must be expected that if an individual voices his or her recurring problems for the 50th time in 2 weeks, and we as regular chat members have exhausted every single possible line of support and advice and still the same is evident, and that advice is clearly not being taken, we, as non-professionals run out of what to say next. Not because we don't want to give either of these things, but simply because we literally have nothing left to say.

I can tell you I'm sorry for the pain you feel a thousand times. I can advise you to visit a professional, a therapist, a doctor, and so on, but if after all this, you still come in expecting a bunch of people in the same boat to be able to fix you, unwilling to try more real methods of help and rehabilitation, then i'm afraid I lose patience. I will support you to the ends of the earth, even when my pain is so great the tears won't stop flowing, I will always do my best to assist and advise – but in the end, if I feel like my support is being thrown back in my face time and time again, I will simply stop.

I am human. I hurt, and have caused hurt. I help, support and advise, and occasionally, I need these things too. I understand loss, abuse; pain. I understand devastating lonliness, manic highs and suicidal lows. I almost always forgive, but I never forget.

Sometimes, I just wish people would see us as humans. We are more than user names and words on a screen.

3 Comments
  1. ancientgeekcrone 12 years ago

    Good blog. One hundred percent correct. the other  truism is to visit chat less. That way one can have peace between the incessant demands of those, who seem to have stagnated in their issues. Once in a while it is useful to remind the chronic ones that healing comes from within. For someone to help you find yourself demand what you stated– a professional. Then there is another type. The person who is or feels friendless and uses their illness as a bid for attention. If they were to find their ownership of their illness, they would empower themselves. There is no such thing as going to a doctor or therapist. The professional can only guide you to your healing. Ask any doctor, they will tell you that they try to set up circumstances in which healing can take place, whether mental and physical and if the person is listening they will detail your roll in the healing process.

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  2. JA 12 years ago

    exactly!

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  3. vinyljunkie 12 years ago

    Good post silent…. Commendable. 🙂

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