I am in a worm hole and as I listen to my favorite songs on the radio, Sara Smile, and One of These Nights I am instantly walkind down Devon Street, Chicag Illinois, north side.  The neighborhood in beautiful at this time it is mostly a Jewish neighborhood. It is spotless clean, you can take the bus cause it runs east and west, as same it runs on another bus route north and south.  Many days the sunlight is out ,when it is not gloomy.  My young heart flys a hunders beats an hour. I am so young and yet I feel so old with all the wisdom and phylosophy, culture and strict morals that I am taught from quite young. I have my high heels on, my brown beautiful leather coat, with a very thin brown belt to match it!  My hair is long and dark brown.  I walk with my head high and proud.  I take my slim silouette down the street, my perfect figure of petite and, averaged out ,mostly to size 8-10.  My spirit is young and pure, my heart is big, with nothing more than the sheerest expectations that I was so, so, very well loved by my husband and by my strangely extended family of my mothers.  My mother would say "our father", but I knew this was a kidding  to my intellect. Still out of respect I would say nothing, in those days you did not talk back, you did not rebell, and you were taught to respest, and to do what you were expected to do.  Those were the best days of my life even though I really did not know it yet.   For I could see what my heart only saw.  I saw the good that only that existed in people, and I build my charachter around it. I always looked at keeping the outside body the best that I could. I could protect my spirit, cause I would go into my own little world, a world as only I knew it, my world, my secrets, not of my reputation, but of my protection to myself as far as spirit was concerned.  I felt so grown up, in a grown up world, that really never allowed me to be a kid, no time for that, must concentrate, must focuss, must protect myself, must tend to my new responsibilities……………for time stood still, and you never thought about growing old……you lived for the moment of this time.  And God, I was so, so, so, happy, so I thought!!! I would go with my husband to the fast food restaurant……….he was my whole life, my God sent present.  The one that I would ask father every night, please God send me someone who loves me and understands me, that was my prayer, nightly, and please help all the good people in the world.  I watched my husband George eat, for me it was enough just to be with him, that was all the food that I required, literatly.!! He would eat the different ice creams, ans I would wonder banna ice cream, hmmm…. I wonder what that would taste like. Those days would seem like they would last forever, and forever we would stay young, and no one would ever challenge my love, for I new how much my new husband loved me. It felt like I was forever with him, and we even had someone say to us, "you look like brother and sister".  When I listen to Sara Smile,  and,  One of these nights I go into that worm hole. It is all right for I have comfort by petting Spotsie.  One of our Perssian Dollface long hair cats, her name is spot, but I call her Spotsie.  I use to think it was funny those old ladies, they have these pets like children, funny cause one day you turn into, one of these old ladies.  But it’s okay God gives us our confort in many strange ways.  For this girl that I use to think was passable pretty walking down Devon Street and the cars would honk while I would go by. I would not turn around and look for that would not seem like a  proper thing to do, instead I would think in my mind, what’s their problem.  The sun comes up, and the sun goes down no matter what is happening in your life just the same. I want to be remembered this way when someone listens to my songs, when someone smiles at me and I would smile back, my spirit would lift like I made their day, as they made mine, simple isn’t it.  The simple pleasure of time!  There in front of me was an older couple one evening day I believe it was. I stared with wonder and delight, with this older couple, hand in hand, and thinking would that ever be me in time!  Funny, our most valuable possesions that we take with is our time, and what we were doing, the simplest things of that time.  No matter how dark things seemed, no matter how strange we behave, no matter of what secrets we lurk inside, time stands still, and that’s all that we take behind, when all is said and done, when we see that light, our hearts run wild and free, and as George always said to me on the phone and that one day he finally admitted to himself……….that’s all that’s left in the end Kathy!!!!! I hope and realizes it to what he says.     I hope and I pray that he finds his way!!!!!! I will always remember my beautiful young husband that way, and I’ll look with the eyes of my heart,  till one day, he finds his way.  My dream is for our spirits to be together as a family, but, he, still has a long hard road ahead I am affraid.  For now I sit here in my little corner when I am not petting spotsie, for she gets grinmpy, and moody, sometimes, and sometimes it looked  as if she had compulsive disorders herself, but "you know", that’s allright cause I love her more each day just the way she is, as I’m sure God loves us also, so be kind to yourselves, believe in yourselves, dtry not to take things so hard in your stride, for this trip we share together, on this road of life.  God bless you all!!! Ekaterini-Kathy   


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