I made it through the day but not all of my work is caught up yet.

I picked out classes for next quarter but I'm still worried I'll screw up or the work load will be too heavy.

My photo project isn't complete because my partner never sent me an image to work on. Apparently, she never checks her school email…

I have a C in one of my classes…so do a lot of others from what I can tell…but I'm scared. What if I mess up? My grade could plummet with it already being this low…but I hate this damn class. She assigns so much busywork and reading it's ridiculous. This class…is pointless. It's the worst one I have ever had, I kid you not.

I haven't worked out hardly at all in two weeks. I've probably just undone all of my progress.

I'm still being ignored by two guys and it's making my emotions somewhat unstable. The one I don't care about, he was controlling anyways. The other, however, has me teetering back and forth between longing, anger, and saddness. I feel a drive to get revenge…to make myself better and if either of them returns, shoot them down and move on. I suppose that comes from constantly feeling "beaten" and "ignored", feelings I've become accustomed to experiencing over the past 10 years. I just always seem to be one of those unlucky people who no one really cares about. Like when it comes right down to it, I don't have anyone who cares enough about me to consider my emotions before acting. I'm usually discarded really easily and it bothers me a lot. I've been considering trying to be more selfish to match my circle of "friends" but I doubt I could do it.

I'm afraid I won't get a job when I graduate. I think once I've definitely gotten a job lined up and my classes are going well, I'll be okay.

1 Comment
  1. ancientgeekcrone 9 years ago

    Good for you. One word of caution. Do not disasterize.

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