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I don't know why, but out of no where for the past day or so I've started missing my Oma (grandma) alot, and the thing is, she died about 5 or 6 years ago. Me and her were really close and before my mom had moved me and my sisters to California my Oma had basically raised me since my mom had to work all the time and my biological father was never home. But ya…today it kind of hit me that I should also get back into contact with my Oma's side of the family. Me, my little sister and my biological dad are the only ones of that side of the family that are in America and the last I heard of them was before my Oma died and then contact just died because her sister could only speak German, but some of the family members were learning English. Basically it was a lack of interest that kept me from persuing contact, also I was so focused on my hate for my biological dad that I didn't want aynthing to do with his side of the family. But it kind of hit me that I should try to contact them and start talking to them because I was taking care of one of the foster kids and I was letting my mind wonder and I just thought about a time in 3rd grade when I had to do a family tree and all I could fill out was my mom's side and on my biological father's side all I had was him, my Oma and my dead Opa (grandpa, he died when my biological dad was still young), and I couldn't fill out anything else because I didn't know, I had called my biological dad that weekend to find out more but all he knew was that there was Manfred and Rita, Manfred was related to us somewho by blood and then there was Tanta Annami (I have no clue how to spell it), and she was my Oma's older sister. Then in high school I found out that Manfred and Rita had kids that were learning English.

But anyways, so I remembered what happened in 3rd grade and then I just started thinking even more about it all, I don't know half of what makes me me. All I had ever known of my biological father's side of the family was that it was dieing off, no one was having kids, or they were just dieing before they could have children. Also, I only know about my mom's side of the family. I know by memory all of our living relatives in America and how we're all related and I can do that for most of our family in Cuba as well. I know stories of my family and where we came from and how we got to America (there's 2 stories but I know both of them) and all of that stuff. But all I know of my biological father's side is this:

My biological father is James Allan Hammerle, he was born in March either near or on St. Patrick's Day. He joined the military right after high school and was an MP (military police). He's been married twice and is currently somewhere in Florida in a shelter. He has a 2 tattoos, one of a tiger head on the back of his shoulder; it's been there since before I was born, and on the other shoulder a wizard's head. I inherted my chemical imbalance from him and he has more mental problems and health problems then I care to remember or know.

My Oma is Waltraud (Trudy) Josephine Hammerle, her birth stone was Ruby and it was also her favorite gem. She had smoked since she could remember, she was born and raised in Germany and had been shot once as a little girl (in the butt…it's a funny story).  She had been married twice, once divorced and was a widow in her second and last marriage. She wore a size 6 in shoes and was a pack rat; keeping everything neat and tidy but still had clothes from when she was in her 20s and had also kept everything that her second husband had ever given her. She loved jewelry, scarfs and gloves. She immigrated to the U.S. when she married her second husband and he was stationed in America. She only had one child and was born with blonde hair. She liked to wear night gowns and slippers to bed and loved to work, read and walk. She died when she was 74 or 73 due to a part of her stomach exploding. Before she died she had had 3 heart attacks in her life, it didn't effect her at all. She loved to croche. And was very stubborn and stern. Everyone says that she spoke with a very heavy german accent but I never heard an accent. Everyone always said that I looked exactly like her and my mom still says that when I was under her roof "It was like living with another Trudy."

Manfred is married to Rita and he's my godfather, he lives in Germany and takes care of Tanta Annami. From what my Oma had told me he is also very stubborn and stern. Tanta Annami is in her 90s (I think). Tanta Annami is not her real name, her name is Annamarie (my little sister was named after her), but everyone has called her Annami since she was little, and I don't know what Tanta means (i think it's aunt but I don't know).

And that's all I know about my biological father's side of the family. Not much comparted to my mom's side lol But ya…I can tell that it's going to be frustrating trying to get in contact with them again because as far as I know of my biological father is the only one that knows how to contact them and he can't even remember his first language (german) and probably hasn't contacted them in years. So when I talked to my mom she said that she might have an old address for them, but she doesn't know if it's any good still, but that she can try to contact my biological father to see if he might have anymore info…Wish me luck 🙂

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