What a horrible couple of days. I can’t even say how much I am glad they are over.
I was going to come on yesterday to write my blog, but infortunatly my internet had died on me and then when I finally did get back on I was out of internet time, AND the stupid website wouldn’t accept the payment from my Credit Card when I knew that there was money in it. VERY anoying.
Yesterday was a hard one. I was desperate to go and get a drink from the liquor store. When my bus passed it, my heart skipped a beat. Its the first time in the last (now 5 weeks) that I have wanted it so so badly. I didn’t get anything, and i’m proud of myself for doing that. I really am. My body and mind was begging for it and I didn’t get anything. Not a drop. I’m beggining to see that I’m a stronger person than I thought I was when it comes to the drinking. In saying this though I still feelt very down.. I shed a few tears. Suicide didn’t come into my thoughts though.
Today has been a very crap one. SO SO SO crap. As soon as I woke up I felt sick. I couldn’t keep anything down so my stomach didn’t settle. Then to make things worse its "that time of the month" for me. Something that I havn’t had for the last 3 months. I’m very irregular which sucks so bad. So I think my emotions have been playing up, something to do with that too. The list keeps piling up. So along with the feeling sick, the period pain, and the severe Itchyness from my sunburn everything is just peachy. ughh. Guys have is sooo easy!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
One bit of good news, my friend had her second scan, and she is only having one baby. Due on the 22nd September. There are many Sept babies around. All those new year and christmas hookups I guess. :0)
I don’t know if I have anything else to say. I’m pretty messed up right now. My mind is just everywhere. Blehhhhh.