As I look back at my time in the program i find out some intresting things….  The phrases that are thrown around so much can be irritating. The one i really hate to here is "You are right where your supposed to be". Like most who call themselves addicts, I want,feel and think I should be further than what I am. How ever in reality I am right where I am supposed to be.

  The best thing about that is i can acctually see the growth in myself. I am also enjoying the rewards of the program….. I was only promised the freedom from active addiction. However, through working the steps and getting honest with myself I have began to love myself for the first time in my life. I have made some real honest to god true friends.  That have been there for me in my most troubled times, that have cried with me and even laughed with me. I am the happiest I have ever been in life…..

  Thats where I am internally…. Externally I want and feel I should have more and be further than where I sit…… Then comes my second least fav phrase, " In his time not yours". I understand that saying completely however I still want it my way. The best part is I am beginning to accept the fact. I believe Acceptance is the key that opens the door to a fuller and more complete willingness to surrender.

  So nothing for nothing, as much as I hate the pfrase YOU are right where your supposed to be…. I look back and have a new sense of grattitude…… I may not be where I want to be, however I am not where I WAS

2 Comments
  1. old_crazy_woman 12 years ago

    wow …what can i say…sounds like you have come so far,,i remember when i met my first old timer in aa i had like 3 weeks,,he had 22 years..i told him man i can’t wait to be where your at…he looked at me,smiled,gave me a hug,,then said you know i’ve come along ways on my journey and yours is just beginning.i have a few more miles than you..but i’m still just one drink away from death…i have 19 years in on my soberity and i lost that dear man 4 years ago..and  as i have many miles in ..i’m still just one drink away from death…so please,,,let your journey take you where you need to be and look and see what your higher power puts  in front of you..for your journey is just getting started….

    may god bless you on your journey of recovery

    bear aka old crazy woman

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  2. newwayoflife 12 years ago

    the frase i cant understand is "in his time not yours" how do they know it’s a he- thet tell u to pick a h.p. of your choice then tell u its a he- what if i picked a pussy for my h.p. im going to call it a he.. i dont think so.. it’s just like me to pick things apart- i like the one keep it simple stupid now that i could understand… Skag

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