So yesterday went well, better than I expected. I talked to a few friends online and on the phone and it helped me feel better.

My therapy session went a LOT better than expected. My husband took me to it as moral support, and that meant a lot. It also gives us some time alone together since it's a long ride both ways. My therapist and I talked a lot about what happened between Zachary and Corey, and she told me that I shouldn't stress about it too much because we caught it so early and because he's so young. She said she was amazed at how I handled Corey after the incident and that made me feel really good. I explained to her that I loved that boy like a nephew and wanted him to know that I would love him no matter what, just that what happened was not okay and should NOT happen again. I think it helped him realize that everything was going to be okay. I know a lot of people think that I should contact the Dept. of Children and Families to handle this matter, but there's so much more to this situation than I feel comfortable talking about. Let's just say that his father plays dirty and the finger would get pointed at his mother in court as the problem and she could lose her son completely because of it. I'm not willing to take away what little stability this 9 year old child has with his Mom and stepdad. They are really good influences on him and he needs that so badly. So, DCF is out of the question. We are trying to get him into counseling though so we can find out what is going on. I'm going to leave it at that.

It turns out that my own issues were magnifying and distorting how things would affect my son, but really, he's just confused about it and it's not really affecting him that much. He just doesn't really understand what was going on. She says to him it was just experimentation and that it was normal for kids to do that sort of thing, especially young boys.

As for the other things we talked about I don't feel comfortable discussing, but let's just say I feel much better about her reassurance about everything. I feel like a normal human being and not some monster, lol.

Today we're finally going to get to the pool, relax and enjoy ourselves. Then we're going to come home and I'm going to watch Coyote Ugly (never seen it) and spend more time with Zachary coloring and drawing posters. He's so artistic and I love it because I know he got that from my side of the family. The apple doesn't fall far from the tree as they say.

My poor hubby got called in to work the midnight shift last night, so he's working a 16 hour day today. Ugh. He's going to be exhausted when he gets home. Maybe I'll give him a nice back massage to help him relax. Dinner will be a good one and he'll enjoy that and sleep well. I had a hard time sleeping last night because the bed was empty, but my dog came and snuggled up against my side and my cat Hogan slept on my chest all night so I didn't feel so alone. Hard to believe that after2 years of him working midnight shifts and only 7 months of him working days I have a hard time going to sleep without him already. But I guess that's love for you.

I have to go, my student should be here any minute. Bless you all and have a good day. (((HUGS)))

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