I suffer from social anxiety disorder. I am afraid whenever I’m in a social situation with unfamiliar faces or large crowds. I’ve been dealing with this issue ever since I was a kid. Everybody (parents, teachers, friends, & colleagues) have always stigmatized me as being coy or shy. Those who don’t know me (personally) think that I am weird, slow, or mentally challenged. I can’t socialize or show personality when I’m faced with “small talk”.

Some of the things that I’ve mentioned above may sound like an oxymoron considering that I am working on my second Masters degree and will be graduating this summer (2017). But I’m dealing with this debilitating “shyness” that may hinder me from gaining employment in a leadership role.

Social anxiety is a very serious disorder that I don’t believe society views as such. Those of us whom suffer from social anxiety disorders “rarely or won’t” speak up and even get noticed. But we deal with this issue in every aspects of our lives (relationships, school, church, and work).

I’ve decided to seek help. I went to see a psychiatrist. She started me on meds and cognitive behavioral group therapy. However, I can’t find any group therapy sessions located in my area (Metro Detroit) solely dedicated to “helping us” individuals whom suffer from social anxiety disorder. We are uncomfortable in social settings so we need individuals who can relate.  I never knew that I was dealing with a fear of people.

I’m glad to know that there is a name for it.  But it is hard to explain to my immediate circle of family and friends.  They just don’t understand that it is an internal feeling. They don’t see or sense fear on the outside, being that I’m able to hide it well.  Im ready to share my story in hopes of getting better and gaining a better quality of life.

5 Comments
  1. Author
    chyna 3 years ago

    Yes, It’s so hard because we want to be socialable but our brain tells us that we are in danger. We fear people or new social settings so we think to fight, flight, or freeze. Social anxiety is the most horrible fear because we have to socialize in order to live. However, most of us live in isolation or become dependent on alcohol or some form or substance abuse. I know that help is on the way and I can’t wait to see what a normal life feels like.

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  2. Author
    chyna 3 years ago

    (LOL) Yeah… it did bring laughter to my world of sorrow. I’m just glad to know that I’m not alone.

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  3. jdiaz79 3 years ago

    I totally relate! I have had social anxiety since I was young. I try so hard to be outgoing and fit in when out in groups, but it just doesn’t happen! I am a homebody or prefer small groups of friends who I am close with. I hate being in large crowds with unfamiliar people. I have hid it so well and now most of my friends and family don’t get it.

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    • Author
      chyna 3 years ago

      Yesss! It is a feeling of shame and embarrassment to have to explain my condition knowing that all eyes and attention will be on me. I’m noticing that I continue to screen phone calls and stay isolated from family and friends so I won’t have to go into further in detail.

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  4. anxiousone2017 2 years ago

    Thank you for sharing your blog. I’m new to here and joined to talk to other people with social anxiety. How is your medication and therapy going? I hope that you are achieving some positive results 🙂 I can relate to a lot of what you said! You get so good at hiding it don’t you! I’ve actually faced my fears to do a job I’m passionate about (teaching English to adults) and usually feel quite comfortable in the classroom. Yet I feel deeply ashamed that I’m still nervous going to the hairdresser, making a phone call or bumping into someone I know. I feel silly that I still get these fears when I’m almost 30

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