All ive written most probably doesnt even make sence. And its all jumpled upI am 24. In 2014 my ex spilt up with me because she couldnt cope with me being depressed. When the split happend i was totally destroy and it was my first time where i thought my life is done cried everysingle night for a weeks shaked in bed. Etc during 2014 i tried to overdose twice choke my self out self harm my self , when i was able to speak to someone i felt like they dont how i feel what im going threw my mjnd every single i felt dead inside every day didnt see the point of living just kept on saying i want to die or just be in some sort of coma so life can just pass by, By the time i got over my ex i kept on haveing anxiety dreams about her and life and kept and looking at my apperance in The mirror saying to my self im so god damn ugly hate my head my forehead is massive hair receding and thining in one spot and im only 24 i i did research for months to see what i could i havent took a picture. Of my self in nearly 2 years dont like people take my picture of the way i looK , i could do anything not even a hair transplant because i dont have the mkney to get one so i worry anout the way i look every single day till this day i feel like every one is looking at ny giant forhead and hair thinking look at that monster. , ive had operation kn 21 st januaray. Put on a nit of weight. Again even tho i lost souch weight and was in prettg decent shape i feel fat every single day i barely leave the house because of the way i look feel like girls wont be atteacted to me because im not attractive because my forehead is massive and i dont have good hair if i can just sort our my hair and make it look a normal person i think ill be a bit happoier but i dont know what to do about my apperance who to talk and even if i find the right person ill feel pathetic talking about. my social circle is 0 since i was diagnosed with clinical depression. Last few day im like whats the point in living i just stay in my room my own mum says my forehead is massive as a joke i think but not sure bevause i take it to heart. and that gets me low so much like whats the point in life , ive also never had a job and im 24 i dont havw a clue what i want to do with my i see all my friends i havent spoke to in years with girlfriends and families and jobs and im just here what a waste of a life i cant get passed it , im most probs just gunna give up and try get back to gym and try stay on esa. Because thats my life because i have no self esteem 0 confidence. Im just a wreck thats not gunna get fixed.Im juat not afraid to get hurt or die
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