It by far is my biggest flaw. It is the thing that stands in the way of my destiny. It is the fact that I can’t let go.
I know some people think that this in an admirable trait but truly it is the one thing about myself I loath. I never know when to just stop or maybe it is that I just can’t. I morn for people no longer in my life. Yes that is human but at the same time I let it over come me at points when it shouldn’t. I get jealous over objects and unworthy people. I hate sicknesses and crutches that others take on instead of letting me love their pain away. I don’t even know if it is possible to love someones pain away but I of all people would surely be the one to try. I have this overwhelming need to fix anyone who will let me.
The irony of it all is that I can’t fix this one thing of my own. I have heard that you should learn to love the little quirks you find in yourself because it is those little oddities that make one unique. I just can’t seem to find the love in something that leaves me so empty, sad, and vulnerable.
I generally try to write things that will inspire, teach, or move people to want to learn. I guess this is just an attempt to do so for myself. I would hope that in putting this all down I can look back over it in the future and remember or learn from it as I do all that I write. Instead I will look back and see where I am only showing my weakness and probably erase it.
Tomorrow I will awake like usual and pretend that no one can get through my bold, tough, leathery exterior. Truth is now you all know that I, like the rest of humanity have a flaw.