It's a bit weird, but probably what's a bit weird is that the past few hours I've been thinking and just going over it all in my mind. I'm currently a size 13 in pants, when people look at me they consider me a big girl, but my boyfriend is naturally one of those people who loses weight when he eats; he'll eat an entire large pizza with everything on it by himself and lose 5 lbs, and then be starving in about 20 minutes. And I've noticed that he asks alot of questions about bigger people that I find stupid. When I first met him it was worse, but now it's not so bad, the questions and stuff aren't as frequent and aren't as stupid.

Like when we first started dating he thought that all people who were overweight were lazy people who just sat on the couch and ate ice cream and potatoe chips all day and had no friends or social life. I proved him wrong almost immedeately by having more of a social life then him and being more active then him but eating less then him. He thought that when someone said they were big boned that was just then being in denial about their weight and making up excuses…I've proved him wrong with that as well. The smallest size I can get down to and be healthy is probably a size 12. But he thought that everyone could be a size 1 or 0 if they just worked hard enough, and that's true, most people would have to starve themselves and become EXTREMELY unhealthy, but it could be done.  But heathly, most people that I know couldn't do that. He also thought that bigger people were all fat, and he used to always laugh when I'd use the term active fat people or fit fat people. I consider myself a fit person for my size, I know that  once I get down to a size 12 that I'll look thick, but for the past few years I've been building up muscle, when I flex you can see muscle in some parts. I work out and I know that if I were to lose all of the fat on my body I wouldn't be skin and bones, or even with just a small layer of muscles, I'd have a nice layer of muscle. But ya…

It kind of got me thinking, do all people who aren't big think like that on some scale? It kind of just made me flash back to my school years. I was always the one being teased until one day I became the bully. But the thing is, I had glasses, frizzy hair, braces, was a tomboy and a nerd, but it was being bigger that I was always teased about. I can't tell you how many people rejected me or made fun of me because I was bigger.

But anyways, I kind of thought a bit and everything, and it got me thinking about how people react when they see us together. They always look extremely suprised when they see us together. And it all basically made me think about growing up with my mom's family; we were all happy and big. The men were on average six feet and 200-230lbs and the women were all 5 feet something and around 215-260lbs (except my grandma and my cousins and little sister and me), but I was taught that as long as the person is active and eats properly then it doesn't matter what they weigh or how big they look so long as it doesn't affect their health and happiness. Then there are my boyfriend's family and most of my friend's families where they all seemed extremely surprised when I'd run around outside, or go hiking or spend all day swimming and what-not.

The same with my exs. I've always dated either guys that are tall and very muscular or guys that are tall and have a bit of a stomach but work out. And even with my exs people would give us weird looks. On many occassions some people would even ask how I got a man like that or why they were going out with me or make some comment about how big people are supposed to date big people and stuff like that.

This may seem like a bit of a naive question, but is that really how the world views bigger people? As lazy people who can't do anything because of their weight and eat an insane amount of unhealthy foods.

1 Comment
  1. Ghostgirl 10 years ago

    I’ve always felt that people who don’t tend to struggle with their weight in some way don’t understand. I, myself, have had rather extreme fluctuations and I get really tired of hearing skinny assholes saying that larger people are “just fat”.

    You know what I’ve noticed? I could go do drugs, smoke, have random unprotected sex with complete strangers, and be overweight and being “fat” would be one of my most “offensive” problems, if not the most offensive problem period. I noticed this when the show Huge came out. Everyone was absolutely horrified and infuriated, completely and totally enraged.




    I mean the amount of crying and yelling and insulting people did over that one show was insane. But when you see a character get drop dead drunk, it’s fine. Or if you see people having sex with random strangers, it’s acceptable (liberal internet is liberal). Oh, and drugs? NP!

    People also have absolutely no problem watching television shows and movies that feature very, very thin girls who are so skinny that they are probably really busting their asses (or denying themselves the pleasure of eating anything “bad”) to look the way they do and OMG DEY R SO SEXXXY!!!!111!oone!!!

    Being large does not automatically mean you are unhealthy. It also doesn’t mean you are lazy and sit indoors all day by yourself. Some people are simply built differently. For example, I got down to like 130 and I was still curvy. No flat stomach, love handles still firmly in place, still had thighs, etc.. I just cannot be skinny like that and it is really hard for me to get weight off and keep it off.

    What’s more, I still felt fat back then. I just felt like if I wasn’t perfectly thin, I wasn’t pretty. And I just read an article about some actress, how OMG she’s so pretty now! She lost weight and no longer has a stomach! She was thin [i]before[/i] though! Are you telling me that not only do I gotta be tiny but I can’t even have a slight bump where my stomach is? O_o

    There is also an emotional side to this whole issue. You can get depressed, even self-destructive because of your weight. It’s a nasty cycle and I personally think that a lot of people could do with some manners and sensitivity. A lot of larger people are already struggling with themselves, they really do not need all the negative attention.

    Sorry about the long rant, topics about weight really get me going, I’ve read some pretty ridiculous things and it just makes my head go BOOM! xD

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