I don't know who will read this, or how they will react. I just think it's time I talk to some other people who are like me. I have had ADD since I was young, and I tested positive for it. I found out recently that I am OCD as well and also have an anxiety disorder. It's a bit odd to have these problems and not know about them until you're 19 years old. I have anxiety attacks daily. I can't stop moving. I'm always shaky. I have to thump my foot, shake my leg, pace, move my keys around, fidget, switch sitting positions, and so forth. I constantly overthink every scenario, even thought I know I have nothing I should worry about. I overthink every process. I question the obvious and ask questions to answers that I don't have, and that nobody has the answer to. I constantly feel like my reality and everything I do is a blurry, messed up dream. What is real? What isn't? Of course I know I'm awake, but does it feel that way? Sometimes I wonder. I feel the pressure in my head. I worry about little things constantly. Will I work enough hours this week? I sent this person a text, but they haven't texted me back. Does this mean they hate me? I check the time and realize it's only been 3 mintutes since I sent the message. I question things I know the answer to. I wonder if I've made myself clear when I speak. I constantly feel the need to specify and clarify things I've already said, not knowing if someone has misunderstood me or not when they usually have. I just feel overwhelmed a lot, even if I have "nothing" going on. I know that I have ADD, OCD, and anxiety, but I have no idea how to control it or try to comfort myself. My parents went 19 years without knowing I had anxiety or OCD, so they don't know how to help either. I've seen a psychologist and a therapist, but so far they haven't given me any help other than to vent. Venting helps, but I need to vent ALL THE TIME. It's a constant everyday thing. I become focused on something and I stay fixated on it. There's a girl that I talk to and when she doesn't reply, I overthink the crap out of everything. "Did she get the message? Or is she ignoring me? Well maybe she's busy. Maybe she doesn't want to talk to me at all. Maybe she's decided that she hates me. Was it something that I did?" I also forget things constantly. I have an awful memory and I always have to right things down or repeat them in my head over and over and over. I have a somwhat photographic memory, but even that is imperfect. I often feel like I am insane or losing touch with reality. I just don't know what to do about controlling or regulating these feelings. It's ridiculous. I haven't talked to other people who are "like me", but I really hope I'm not the only one who deals with this. Talking to someone else who has to deal with this would be great. I don't really care who it is. Guy, girl, old, young; I just want someone who can share this experience and offer advice. Please reply or message me.


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