What happened to me. I was a good kid with good grades. i thought i was okay. i wanted to live and i had big dreams for my life. Now everyday is the same, im depressed, anxious, suicidal, limited outlets for help,. I have little friends or family that care, no one knows everything except my partner, and i havent spoken to her in days. She went on a cruise on Saturday, her phone died and i expected it to be charged because i know she brought a charger and she could’ve bought one. i dont know what happened. its wednesday night at 10:45ish currently. i have not spoken to her, life 360 says that her phone is still dead. i contacted her mother who is not on the cruise and she said my partner’s dad probably took her phone. i dont know what to do. Is she hiding from me and using this cruise as an excuse to cheat? what if her dad really took it, how is my partner doing without me, she says she relies on me heavily which i believe but what if it was a lie? what if she’s cheating on me as we speak? but what if she’s harming herself because of our seperation and i cannot help her? what if she commited suicide? did she know how much i love her and how much i need her here?? what if shes a whole different person and lies to me? but what if she is genuinely hurting herself and im sitting here doubting her?????? what if the boat crashed and she died? what if shes being raped and tortured and theres no way for me to help save her? i dont understand i need her here i need her texting and calling me I NEED MY PERSON. please come back. please. come. back.
why?
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UPDATE: she cheated on me with a guy she met on the cruise and is now probably pregnant! i should die