Why We Cut: The Story Behind Our Scars

Dedicated:
To those who wonder what i’ve always hidden.
To those who thought i was great, and wanted to be me.
To everyone who’s ever cut or inflicted Self-injury .
To those who’ve been caught.
To those who haven’t, and hide your cuts every day
To everyone whose lives have been turned upside down because they weren’t ashamed of cutting.
To anyone who’s ever had somebody look you in the eyes and say “all you want is attention”
To anyone who’s “been there” and “done that”
To anyone who had courage and sought help.
To those who didnt and died b/c they cut too deep
To those who live in fear of being caught and being stuck in a room on the Psychiatric floor.
To anyone who walks around w/ a mask to appear happy when really they’re dying inside.
To the ones who wear long sleeves and sweatpants on the hottest day of the year to hide their scars.
…This is for you

My Thoughts on Cutting and Stereotypes:
If you’re not a cutter and you’re reading this, then one of the following is true….
1. You’re nosy.– fuck off, we’re not animals in cages for you to gawk at.
2. You hate cutters and are only trying to find evidence to prove your anti-cutter theories and beliefs. — you fuck off, too. Be openminded and then you can read this.
3. You’re curious about us and why we do it.
4. You used to be a cutter (in which case, good job and congrats on stopping)
5. You’re considering Cutting… (Dont.. its not healthy and it can be addicting…This is not a How-To guide.)
6. You Are A cutter… in which case, you might agree w/ most of what’s said here.

Common Stereotypes:
1. All cutters want to die.– This is bullshit. Some use it as a transfer from abstract, emotional pain to physical pain that you can see and touch. SOME are actually ADDICTED to it (cutting causes a chemical realease and an emotional “high” that can be addicting)
2. All Cutters have attempted suicide.– Not all cutters have tried to kill themselves… example, if u read number one, you’d understand that ALL cutters WANT to die… However, out of the ones that do want to, very few have had the balls to actually try it. Plus, most ppl who DO want to die actually achieve it.
3. All that cutters want is Attention.– Also not true. Most cutters dont want attention, but they dont want to be ignored. Whether we like it or not, we DO exist.. And we like to be acknowledged of that existance, but we DONT like the spotlight. I mean, you’re not gonna go around screaming “Hey, look at me! I cut my arms and legs and where ever else I could think of, why don’t you call a doctor and get me committed!”
4. Cutters have no friends, and that’s why they cut.–That’s bullshit.. B/c Most cutters have cutter-friends… And maybe even a few normal ones, and if u dont have friends, then im a good one.
5.Only Gothic ppl are cutters.– Cutters could be anybody from Goths to nerds to preps and anything in between. I hate labels but that’s the only way I can explain it
6. Cutters are going to Hell.– If you’re religious, then ur not really good at it., b/c everyone knows it says that all you have to do is ask for forgiveness and all that junk, and then all sin and fall short or w/e. So get past this one, no worries.
7. All Cutters are Depressed.– True, depression is normally what makes ppl cut.. if there are other reasons, nobodys ever told me. However, even after the depression is gone, There are reasons ppl keep cutting.. maybe they’ve gotten used to it as a transfer of pain So that the abstract becomes solid (like it is for me)…or maybe its that they’ve become addicted to the “high”. Who knows.
8. Cutters can stop whenever they want, its a choice, and they’re just sick and morbid.– Wtf is this?? Like i said, some ppl can be addicted to it, so its not easy to stop..And if you’re Not one of us, dont tell us what we can do “whenever we want” until you GO thru it, assholes.
9. Cutters have low self-esteem and they’re outcasts. — Im not sure on this one. Alot of the cutters that I know DO have low self esteem, but some dont. Some ppl cut b/c of sadness, some b/c of anger…some b/c they’ve been hurt by others, so they want to be control…they hurt themselves so that nobody else can… Also abuse of any kind..physical, sexual, emotional, verbal, etc.. There’s no limit to the reasons a person might feel the need to cut.. you never know. As for outcast, I’ve already said that it can affect anybody in any “group” or label.
10. Cutting is a cry for help and they should get professional help.– Some ppl MAY be reaching out..but I highly doubt it. If we were, then why would we work so hard to hide it?

Recently, a cutters support group online hit the news… but not FAIR news. They reporter took stereotypes and basically only backed it up w/ a few facts, but excluded all the other information (as far as I understand..) It really pissed me off. This group wasnt a “cutter hang-out” …Its a place where we feel comfortable talking to other ppl w/ the same problems who understand what we’re going thru for once… Im tired of the fucking stereotypes. I’ll never forget my pain when somebody would find a cut and call me pitiful or tell me I just want attention. Cutters aren’t sick, diseased ppl. We’re just the ones who handle situations and pain more dramatically than others.
When a cutter goes to a person in authority, like a teacher, doctor, counselor, etc… and asks for help, what are we greeted with? We’re automatically shoved in a gown w/ no butt-flap, stuck in a room in the psychiatric ward, and not allowed to have any balloons cuz they assume we’re suicidal and we might “strangle” ourselves w/ the strings! Somebody like an alcoholic or a drughead goes in there, says “Look, I have a problem and I need help…” and boom, they’re given a pat on the back for seeking help, and get stuck right away in a support group …(plus, they get to keep their balloons)
How are we different, really? Yet they TREAT us differently, like we’re diseased and contagious. Alcoholics turn to alcohol when they feel hurt or when something goes wrong…And we turn to sharp objects. What’s the difference in our problems, besides the remedy we used? Cutters dont need judgement. We need people to try to understand us, and not just classify us all in one fucking group and label us. They try to pretend they know, and act sympathetic, but has anyone asked us “why did u start?” or…”what’s wrong” or..”do you need to talk?” … Most people never ask us b/c they’re scared of us ….either that or they just dont fucking care

1 Comment
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