To be honest I don’t really know how to open this up..

        Two years ago I met a guy named Brian on June 20, 2015.  Brain was a very sweet, caring young man.  tough, and smart, but he huge a huge heart, never did a thing but love me.  we had many things in common.  such as our family’s he too cared for his little sister, didn’t have a good relationship with his parents and he looked at himself the same as I looked at myself.  so we instantly started talking more and more each day.  we were great friends we would talk about how silly some people can be, about young love.  well he started to have feeling for me, and I wasn’t sure what to do with that.  we were friends nd I liked things the way they were. so when he asked me out I said the truth.  well, he just would give up.  he treated me like a princess.  sending me gifts, claiming that I made him the happiest he could ever be.  that me would never give up trying to win my affection.  a couple months went by and I started to care for him very much, and agreed to date.  this of coarse made him go bonkers because I agreed to do so.  still makes e laugh when I think about that day. hehe. he knew everything there is to know about me all the way from my favorite color to my deepest secret.  while we were together I found no need to hurt myself.  or even think about ending my life.  we had it all planned out when he turned 18 and I was 17, we would have dropped everything he would have brought hi guitar, and I would bring my voice.  we would have went from there.  silly, I know?  but dreams are dreams.  loved me dearly, I know he did I could see it in the way I would catch him staring and me.. when id look at him he wouldn’t look away.  he would just stare and say ” god damn I love you” under his breath.  id have to poke him to bring him back to earth.  when he realized I heard hi each times he’d blush and say well its true.  there is a song he dedicated to me ” 1,2,3″ by the plain white tee’s.  cutest song ever he would serenade me that song over-and-over again.  so months went by and I had grown very attached.  and on February 19, 2016.  he took his life..  I think to myself everyday ” maybe if u would have said hi he would still be here.”  or  ” maybe if u would have shown him more love, maybe he’d feel it?”   not a day goes by when I don’t think about him.  i’m still crushed about it but he’s happy?

thanks for reading

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