So as some of you may already know, my family has been incredibly disfunctional for the past year, both my parents cheated on eachother, my mom got caught first, she moved in with her mistress, and had been lving with him since then, which has been since last Decemeber. I finally started to get a bit more used to my family being ripped in half and screwed up, getting used to the new guy and his family, and then in the midst of my trying to claw my way out of this relapse that I've been stuck in, life sends me another whirlwind of shit. My mother called me the other day, telling me that she was on her wayback "home" (where my fiance and I are now living with my father and my one other brother). She tells me that she's coming back with my other brother who had moved into her boyfriend's house with her (who has severe anger mangement and behavioral problems), because my brother tried punching my mother's boyfriend in the face after he told me that he couldn't have another sausage at breakfast…they both got physical with eachother, the boyfriend and my 18 yr old brother, and my mother threw herself in between both of them and broke her finger trying to break them up. So last night, she came here the house, broken hearted, in tears, telling me she wants to die, she's so lonely, everything that I FEAR going through every day (ie, my obsessions of my fiance Eric leaving me). On top of the fact that Eric strongly resents my mother for the hell that she put me through last year when she left us and treated me like a stranger, on top of Eric resenting my father also, for not taking care of me and leaving me stranded to deal with my college student loans myself , cleaning up after him and my brother, while contantly making the house a wreck and rarley lifting a finger to help ME out to upkeep the house….my mother and delinquent brother come back into the picture…not only am I FREAKED out that Eric is going to end up saying in another day "F**K you all I'm leaving…but on top of that, just seeing my parents together brings back ALL OF THAT depression, and uproots ALL of those awful feelings that I had when all of this seperating began…I feel like I don't even know how to pour myself a glass of water…like a chicken that has JUST has his head cut off and is now running around, bumping into walls, falling down, and then doing it all over again…when does this shit STOP