i have had a pretty good relationship with my parents for many years.  they are 81and 84, and i am now 60.  my mother has always leaned on me, and never really treated me like her daughter, but more of a person who is suppose to do for her and my brothers.  sometimes when she talks, i about her children (i have two brothers), i have to remind her that she has 3 children, and i am one of them.  i never remember my mother hugging or kissing me, or expressing concern or love toward me.  as a young married person, 33 years ago, with 2 children of my own, she would come on all vacations with our family, free of charge.  she never had to pay for anything when she was with me.  my mom only has 3 grandchildren, my 2 boys and my niece, daugher of my 57 yr. old brother who lives in florida.  my youngest brother (only 45) suffers from depression that he refuses to treat with medications, and has a very sour, sad and sadisdistic attitude toward life and all people.  he does go to a psychiatrist, but refuses any and all treatments, which he desperately needs.  he honestly thinks he is the godfather (and i am not kidding ab out that).  he has lived in nevada for the past 5 yrs, away from all of us, and our little family functioned pretty good.  we had open communication and were considered pretty close knit.   my son nicholas became very close to my brother, his uncle, and decided to have him as godfather to his son.  at the time my brother flew in to sponsor this child, he had a little argument with my niece, his niece.  he has since moved back here, and one of the first things he did was call a family meeting, my niece not included (his niece also).  he proceeded to tell everyone that he disowned her and he wanted all of us to disown her, and she was not to be invited to family get togethers, and if anyone invited her hewould take it as a direct disrespect to him, and he would not bother with that family member.  now you get the picture of the the "godfather".  well, i, being the oldest of my 2 brothers, told him that i would not do that because of his whim.  i have to say, that when he moved here that he decided to live with my son whose child he baptised.  he lived there for 2 months, did not give any money to them for food, and brought his dog with him.  he continued to try to control their household and also tried to break up my son’s marraige.  he walked around my son’s neighborhood to walk his dog with a baseball bat to protect himself (my son lives in a very nice upper class neighborhood.)  needless to say, my son and my brother had arguments, and my brother moved out into a hotel.  i have to add, that my brother tells my aging parents everything and more, and they believe him.  they believe everything that comes out of his mouth.  they say he is depressed and needs help, but do not recognize the fact that he has a warped sense of being of himself and the people around him.   but, they side with him.  my mother called me one day and said that she would not come to my house anymore if my son or niece were here.  i proceeded to tell her how i felt about that, and that she was an enabler of her sick son, and she was tearing up her family.  well, that has happened.  i no longer bother with my  aging parents and neither does the rest of our little family.  my brother has caused his aging parents to be alone.  the last i heard my brother was thinking about moving to florida, and leaving my parents.  they now have no one to take care of them, and no family.  their holidays will be alone and so will they.  i hope he decides to stay and take care of them, since he caused this whole situation.  my parents sold their home about 7 yrs. ago, and got a profit of about 200 thousand dollars, and put everything in my brothers name (the one who is depressed and causing all the problems).  they hid this from me for many years.  my other brother(who lives in florida, father of my niece) found out and was very upset about this, and my parents and him were fighting.  my mother proceeded to tell me lies about the reason they were fighting, and caused my brother and i not to talk, so that i wouldn’t find out about the money. i also found out recently that my depressed brother took 175 thousand of my parents money and put it down to purchase his house in nevada, and that’s what my other brother (florida) was sooooo upset about, and my parents hid this from me and lied about it.  but i went on fine after finding this out.  i was extremely hurt, but let this go.  then my mother told me that she didn’t want to be around my son who helped his uncle sooooo much.  if it wasn’t for my son, my brother wouldn’t have been about to move here.  my son went to nevada helped him pack all his belongings into a u haul and drove him home.  how could grandparents do that to their grandchildren – disown them?????????  i have been used to being treated like this my whole life from my parents, but i refuse to have them treat my children and my niece like this.  i am so anxious over this.  i am in disbelief.  i have increased my zoloft medication, on advise of my doctor) and suffer anxiety and crying spells over this. 


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