Gah! guys i've come so far but i'm losin it right now! just gotta keep my mind straight, gotta keep writing on here more often. Yes. So. Let's update 🙂
Heard Jess is dating that douchebag again, good for her, she almost went 1 1/2 months without a boyfriend. i hate it when she decides to message me after not talking to me for a couple months, it just always sounds so critical and just makes me think, why must you come in and try to break me down every so often? Don't you know your already a constant voice in my head despite how much i can't stand you, despite how mean you are, and how much you've changed? Just get out of my head please.
2 weeks left of school, and i have no time to study for my finals :/ I feel like i'm gonna fail my polysci class, and possibly biology. While i'm loving this play things with the volunteering for the daycare and whatnot it's taking up way to much of my time.
The Rise Against concert made me feel amazing, but after i came down from that high i realized i haven't been that happy or felt good like that in over a year or so, so i got so down on myself i almost decided to screw myself over and make myself a comfortable hole to die in. Goodness being who i want to be is friggin hard, but i know if i can make it i'm gonna feel better, i might actually like myself and who knows even be happy? I seriously need to log some cuddle time. I think that's what i miss the most about having a relationship, i love the constant hugs and having someone to pull into your arms.
I have church tomorrow in the morning. So i'm gonna try to sleep. Recap of the week first
waking up, partially successful, improvement definitely.
Breakfast, did very good at great improvement.
bedtime, better, improvement.
Being more productive with time and homework also a check,
Didn't have anytime this week to work out so fail there, but as soon as school is over i'm gonna be working out with McKay lots so whoo hoo to that.
keeping a balanced mood.. eh, good at beginning of the week, sucked it up hardcore at the end, big swings blah blah
No mas soda, good job me
Kept my rituals pretty good at beginning of the week, slacked off near the end, jumping back on that,
i did not do a DT update everynight like i was suppose to, i'm blaming the lack of time, but even if i lack time i should.
Love you guys, i'm gonna pass out now