I have never sought out professional help, but I am still surviving.  I am flawed, no one is perfect, and certain ways of life don’t always accomodate to every person. This is a reflection of my life, what I’ve done and what I continue to do. I don’t always have good days, but I don’t always have bad days either. I’ve always only had myself to rely on, so here’s how I’ve managed to cope:

1. Research

a. If you feel a certain way (a mood) or have been through an experience (abuse, used, dumped, etc) then do your research (online, through books, on tv, viewing movies, asking people, etc) and find out more it! You have to educate yourself on an issue before you can take the necessary steps to survive for the rest of your life.

2. Focus

a. Make your "issues" the center of your attention; only when you are ready to move on forward with your life. Think, understand & focus on what’s changed and the effects it has produced. Think about the person you were, and the person you’ve become. Do not jump to conclusions. Focus on what has happened, and what you would like t o happen now or in the future. We would not be able to understand the value of happiness or love if we didn’t know what it was like to be unhappy or unloved, so endure all of your suffering until you are ready to focus on not suffering anymore.

3. Take one day at a time

a. Live each day, one day at a time. If you focus on the past too much, you will never be able to move forward. If you focus on the future, you will begin to feel overwhelmed and possibly fall back into your old routines. Plan for the moment because life changes unexpectedly, without any thought. Ever day you wake up in the morning, you are given a new chance to change and start your life over again. You have a world of choices but you just won’t be able to see any alternatives when you’re always looking in front of a mirror. Do you think that you are the only person whose has ever had to endure all that you have? What about the other 6 billon people in the world whom you have never met or all the other people who have left this world before you? Just remember to breathe & the fact that your life could end at any moment.

4. Eliminate dead weight

a. Stop holding on to friends or people in your life who aren’t worth your time

b. Respect yourself, your body and your thoughts, so that others may do the same

c. Stop holding on to the idea that you can be the same person you once were. You will never be that person again b/c your experiences have made you wiser.

d. Get rid of things that trigger negativity or bad memories

e. If you are so used to a boring routine lifestyle, then come up with a way to make it more interesting some how

f. If you don’t have the motivation to do something that needs to get done, then use whatever energy you have to do something else productive, rather than just giving in and taking the easy way out.

g. If you don’t have the motivation to do something you once enjoyed, then try doing something you always wanted to do or never got the chance to do, before its too late.

5. Discover new ways to keep your mind occupied

a. Listen to music

b. Take naps throughout the day

c. Write

d. Read a book

e. Do crafts (paint, draw, build things)

f. Exercise (when you have time or feel full of energy)

g. Attend social events, even if for a short time

h. Cook

i. Watch movies

j. Go back to school

k. Volunteer

l. Work

m. Join a team, club, or social group

n. Play games online

6. Never say never

a. You always have a choice. You can choose to do nothing or you can choose to do something. One day you’ll walk into a brick wall and realize that there are always choices and resources out there, you just have to be willing to accept them. Don’t let your problems & your fears get the best of you. Find people (online or in the real world) who have endured the same experiences you have & find out what they have done to cope with their situations

7. Don’t worry about things beyond your control

a. You are human & do not possess any type of special powers. Focus on what you can do or change, and not what is out of your control. Sometimes you have to sit in the backseat and let someone else help you with directions when you are unsure what road to take. Set up daily or weekly goals, rather than weekly or monthly goals and reward yourself when you’ve accomplished your goals.

8. Live life

a. Do what you need to do to make yourself happy and worry about other people’s feelings afterwards. If you are unstable, then you will only be able to give others half of what you are fully capable of. We only have this one life, so make the best of it. If you want to live out the rest of your life suffering and thinking that life can’t get any better, then go for it without complaints b/c that’s what you have chosen to believe. Who is anyone else to say what you are entitled to believe? Everyone’s life is unique and has been built with individual instructions. In life you get what you deserve based on how much effort you’ve put into something. If everyone cared what other people thought, then we would all be standing still b/c we would be too afraid to breathe! Live according to what you can achieve on a daily basis because you may never get a second chance to live.

9. Share:

a. Share your time

b. Share your heart

c. Share your laughter

d. And your tears

e. Share your stories

f. Share your joy

g. Share your smiles

h. And your fears

10. Basic Reminders:

a. Eat healthier!

b. Get proper sleep at night

c. Recognize the signs of repetitive thoughts, behaviours or feelings & allow yourself to discover ways that help you work through them each time they occur

d. Ask or seek help in any form when in doubt

e. Accept that you won’t always find the answer(s) right away, but you will have gained valuable knowledge of your experiences

f. When you have a good day, run as far as you can with it

g. Do what you must for yourself, and let others make suggestions, but never let them dictate your life

If my thoughts or words have any positive affect on your life, I’m glad I could inspire you. If not, then that’s okay to, and I hope you find some inspiration in your life to help you cope to survive. xo