I have learned the hard way through my 1st marriage and now my 2nd one that people are so different.  With my 1st husband all he wanted to do was grip, rant, and rave.  With this 2nd he is somewhat like the 1st, but not as bad.  I had to lay down some gound rules for him and myself.  The first one is ALWAYS THINK BEFORE YOU SPEAK!  Because you could hurt the one you love.  People all have told me to leave my 2nd husband and just move on without him, but they dont live with him and I love him so much.   I just tell them I am the one in this marriage and not them and I have to take care of it.  Lord knows if I listened to everybody I would really be messed up.  I have it bad for this man just like he does me.  We decided that once these crazy hours slow down that he is working we are going to look into some Christain Counseling with our pastor and he will be able to give us some Godly advice.  I know that God put us together and I know that he doesnt want us to part.  My son calls this man his father even though his natural father has come back into his life.  He says mom why should I go stay every other weekend with him when he doesnt even call me.  I said well okay whatever you want to do.  I am not going to force my son to go if he doesnt want to.  He has a mind of his own and he can make that decision his self.