It started with coming out to friends. I’m not an addict, I’m a lesbian. I need CoDA meetings and AlAnon. I need recovery from my family of origin and abusive relationships, failed at best.

Now all these feelings are coming to the surface. All the resentment and anger, coupled with fear and shame. Mom always wanted grandchildren and I don’t want to put all obligation onto my heterosexual sibling. I don’t need mom’s approval to survive anymore. I don’t need her approval to be OK with myself.

Its her stunning lack of empathy that scares me. She has narcissistic tendencies, and this is something she certainly has never identified with. She has no prior emotional experience to use as navigation for this. She is an attorney, and I do expect her to challenge me with questions. She’s wicked smart, but lacks empathy. What do I say to keep her in the emotional loop without provoking hurt feelings??