everybody is getting on my nerves and im beyond irritated with motherfuckers. everybody wants to comment on how i raise my child and how he does not listen to me but he can listen to everybody else. I already feel bad that he does not listen to me as it is. but no one cares about my feelings cuz if they did they would stop calling me stupid and dumb and a bitch, or a horrible mom. I am not selfish just because i want people to consider my feelings since i consider there's whenever i am arguing with someone. I do not even want to be here anymore, since i am a disaster in there lives. I only create misery and unhappiness so why should i even be here? I have 2 kids and i am on medication but they can not even keep me from my thoughts anymore. just when i thought everything was getting better i find that my condition was stronger all along and just hiding waiting for the perfect moment.I just want it to be over but it is never ending and my mind is too fucked up from it, that i know my brain has deteriated because my mind runs slower now and my memory has become lost and my body is aching and moving slower than ever. I am young so why is this happening to me? but then i forget the question and say fuck it, fuck everybody, i do not want to fight this anymore because it has not made me stronger, it has made me weaker than ever, my body would numb itself whenever it would feel it coming back and suppress my feelings.i hate that i have let myselfsink this far down into this.I do not know what to do anymore