For the record, Im utterly lost. I dont know what I enjoy doing anymore other than playing xbox. Ive shut myself away in my house, unable to think of anything Id like to be doing. I no longer have any words for anyone about anything. My mind is just locked in this behaviour and I know its the exact opposite of what I should be doing. I know that human beings are social creatures, I know we need the emotional and spiritual support of our peers in order to persevere through the toughest of times. I also know that to recieve you must first give. Thats my problem, I dont know that I have anything to give anymore. When Im around people I find myself trapped in my own mind with absolutely nothing coming to it. I have no interest, opinion, or personality it seems. I cant pull myself outside of the cage ive built for myself in my mind. I know I need to work…but I also know that noone wants to be around a zombie either. I worry that even if i get the job they will quickly realize how antisocial ive become and cut me loose quickly. I hate the awkward silences, and that seems to be all I can produce…I know ive been this way for years, but recently its gotten alot worse. I finally decided to admit i have a problem and seek therapy, though I picked the absolute worst time because my insurance will end at the end of the month. It seems everything I need to do I must do on my own. Im putting this out there because for one if i can see my own words in front of me, It makes me remember that I do know how to communicate. I also hope anyone can help me figure out how to rediscover myself. I know i need to find some reason to get myself out of bed in the morning.
Life when im conscious
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So about this week….
Spookloops, , Depression, Anxiety, Career, Depression, Grief, Questions, Relationships, Sleep Disorders, Therapist, Therapy, 1
I'm finally on a computer upon which DT doesn't look broken or crashed. I apologise, this might be a...
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June 13th 2015
Star2015, , Depression, Anxiety, Stress, 2
Today I woke up early again after another nightmare. I thought the lexapro was supposed to decrease the dreams....
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Today…I will start over (until I fuck up again)
Vincent_Freeman, , Depression, Career, Domestic Abuse, Sex Therapy, Therapist, Therapy, 0
I dragged into therapy today. I was almost late because instead of using the extra time I afforded myself...
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Feeling Lost
Michelle.berry, , Depression, Sleep Disorders, Weight Loss, 0
I fell for him so hard, so fast. And when he broke me, I went tumbling to the ground....
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“Just one more night….” (what Ace asked of me last night, when I was wavering)
thebadkitty, , Depression, Addiction, Bipolar, Career, Depression, Questions, Relationships, Religion, Sex Therapy, Sexual Abuse, Therapist, 0
"I heard there was a secret chord That david played and it pleased the lord But you don’t really...
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I can’t go on
Picku332, , Depression, Sleep Disorders, 1
I know am going to Hell, and I can\’t stop it. My life, I just can\’t live one, even...
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Petty Petty Housemate
Hellobubs, , Depression, Anxiety, Depression, Relationships, Sleep Disorders, Stress, 1
I don't even know where to start to be honest.I haven't felt frustrated or stressed or tense in a...
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Good Friday.
sadjac, , Depression, Child, Obesity, Relationships, Weight Loss, 0
Happy Easter anyone that reads this. I ended up going to my friends place for a good friday lunch,...

