For the record, Im utterly lost. I dont know what I enjoy doing anymore other than playing xbox. Ive shut myself away in my house, unable to think of anything Id like to be doing. I no longer have any words for anyone about anything. My mind is just locked in this behaviour and I know its the exact opposite of what I should be doing. I know that human beings are social creatures, I know we need the emotional and spiritual support of our peers in order to persevere through the toughest of times. I also know that to recieve you must first give. Thats my problem, I dont know that I have anything to give anymore. When Im around people I find myself trapped in my own mind with absolutely nothing coming to it. I have no interest, opinion, or personality it seems. I cant pull myself outside of the cage ive built for myself in my mind. I know I need to work…but I also know that noone wants to be around a zombie either. I worry that even if i get the job they will quickly realize how antisocial ive become and cut me loose quickly. I hate the awkward silences, and that seems to be all I can produce…I know ive been this way for years, but recently its gotten alot worse. I finally decided to admit i have a problem and seek therapy, though I picked the absolute worst time because my insurance will end at the end of the month. It seems everything I need to do I must do on my own. Im putting this out there because for one if i can see my own words in front of me, It makes me remember that I do know how to communicate. I also hope anyone can help me figure out how to rediscover myself. I know i need to find some reason to get myself out of bed in the morning.
Life when im conscious
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My Struggles
mddandme, , Depression, Anxiety, Child, Depression, Grief, Questions, Relationships, Religion, Suicide, 0
I started to notice a change in myself around the time I was 15 or 16 years old. Teens...
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Sad and trying to find community
Trying318, , Depression, Depression, Suicide, 2
Hi. I’ve tried pushing down what I thought I could manage. I used to have severe depression in high...
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Hell
Aquazium, , Depression, Marriage & Family, 0
It’s a trap. Don’t come here. You’ll find yourself stuck Between what is right And what is said to...
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Useless
uberbobolink, , Depression, Parenting, Sleep Disorders, 0
This morning Housemate A found me collapsed across a couple of beanbags in front of the television. She messaged...
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Desperation
ctkirk, , Depression, Chronic Pain, Depression, Questions, Therapy, 0
I’ve joined this forum out of desperation. Perhaps it would be more accurate to say I’ve joined out of...
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One foot on the ground
squiff, , Depression, Career, Child, Depression, Grief, Psychosis, Sleep Disorders, Stress, Suicide, 2
I've had some lovely messages from my friends on here recently asking where I've gone. The truth is, I...
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Okay, you really don’t understand what I’m going thought…
usaporkchops, , Depression, Depression, Grief, Medication, Questions, Religion, Spirituality, Suicide, Therapist, Therapy, 0
It’s tough being a person with clinical depression. You have no motivation to get up out of bed. You’ve...
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Just a silly little guy
Edmund, , Anxiety, Depression, LGBT, Uncategorized, 2
Hello everyone, whos out there and reading my little thoughts. I wondre how many people feels like me now....
