The ending of a trying weekend and trying "weak" is my state of mind. Several moments over the course of the weekend saw panic attacks and anxiety. Frustrations from the aforementioned have me in a state of depression. On Saturday, while having a moment of high anxiety, I found myself chanting, "Every failure and adversity carries within it the seed of an equivalent benefit". I'm not sure why this was the first thing to come into my mind, but it proved affective at calming me a little. So I pulled out my tattered copy of Think and Grow RIchand began reading aloud, as in a teaching or preaching manner. I had purchased a bottle of 5-HTP the day before. Although I researched it thoroughly, I had my reservations about taking something new. I took one of the supplements and it seemed to work. I woke up in the middle of the night, itching like crazy, so I decided that I wouldn't take anymore of the supplements. The next morning I observed some kind of flying ant-like insects all over my nightstand. Now, I'm not so sure what caused the itching. The supplements are new and so are the ants. Sometimes I swear, all things work together to confuse me.
Anyway, I find myself frustrated when trying to explain what it's like to be me to someone else who has no clue as to what SAD and GAD are or what it feels like to have these. It's a lost cause because they cannot empathize, however hard they try. Lately, I've found solace in talking to myself…not like that, but reassuring and encouraging myself. Blogging on this site helps a lot. I can't even count how many times I've turned to this site during a panic attack. I'd start blogging, only to quit because my symptoms would subside. It's comforting to know that there are others who can understand what I'm going through.