Some days I lie in bed,
Thinking, "hey, today's going to be a good day,"
I get up in a happy mindset
I pour some cereal in a bowl
But as I raise my spoon to eat that first bite,
"shit they found me"
I feel the black presence leaping from the neurons in my brain
I feel them coating every happy thought in a rich luscious coat of sticky black paint
I remember "today is a bad day."
I can't deal with not having friends anymore, sure I have my old friends I'm still on contact with , but if I'm Down I can't just go hangout with them to feel better, I can't hug any of my friends or even see them. I'm not part of their world anymore, I'm not a part of what used to be my entire world. And that crushes me.
I'm sick and goddamn tired of living out of my suitcase, packing backpacks and switching homes every few nights. I love my grandparents to death but I'm sick of their bitching, all my grandpa does is bug me about my future, who gives a fuck?! I have my future taken care of so don't you worry about it. And all my grandma does is bitch at me about keeping my room clean and making sure I eat my vegetables and dRink milk every day. I'm a fucking adult I can take care of myself so STOP TREATING ME LIKE A FUCKING CHILD. I can't live this way anymore, it's pushing me over the edge. Help.
Man what I would do to have a truck run me over while I cross the street right now.