Feeling pretty Goddamn good this morning.
And that’s kind of refreshing. The last few weeks have been hell-on-earth anxiety. BUT, and who would’ve thunkit, finding my Tribe and integrating myself into same, has been kind of liberating. Finding this site, making the connections I’ve had, sharing my story, hearing the stories of others…good stuff. I’m not the only one.
I’m not the only one.
I’m not alone, even if I feel like I am half the time. I’m not the only one struggling with these fucking hideous demons of Anxiety and Depression and Confusion and Sadness and feeling Lost.
I’m not alone, because I can plug my story into the stories of so many others, on this site and elsewhere, and I see that it’s all the same. Only the names and avatars change. And we can all heal from it. Together.
I’m not alone because I’m in Maine while most of my most treasured Tribe-mates are in NH, Boston, NYC, Raleigh, Chicago, LA… Distance is the hardest part of being in a family of like-minded co-conspirators. But even a digital connection is good, and especially new digital connections such as I’m finding here. I do believe I’ll just keep going.
It’s a gorgeous Christmas-y winter morning in New England. It’s snowing like mad, and I’ll have to shovel my driveway a few times today. But right now I’m safely inside (if stuck in the demoralizing process of job-hunting) with a freshly brewed pot of black fuel. Wifey made it to her office safely. I’m breathing (deep!) and my new furnace is cranking out delightful heat. I’m loved and cared for, and ever more aware of myself, my humanity and my battle to slay my demons and become an ever better me.
Not a bad Monday, if I do say so myself (and I do)…