A lot has gone on since I last posted, but I’ll see what I can do about catching up on things about me and my life these days. I spent the whole winter by myself, and, as expected I ended up sinking into myself. My family helped out very surprisingly. My dad, for the first time, didn’t pick on me about my apartment being a mess. He’s usually the type to tell me he’s going to get a shovel and just dump everything in the garbage that’s not attached to the walls or floor. He’s always been like that, wanting to throw it all out the window, and it’s always annoyed me. This time, though, he just started picking stuff up. He didn’t have to, and I told him as such, but he just kept going until almost the whole floor was picked up and there were two garbage bags ready to go out. I made sure to thank him, but I don’t really know if I honestly thanked him enough.
My mom helped out too, she did my dishes. I’d gotten so behind that every dish, down to the last bowl, the last plate, the last utensil, even the last plastic container were all dirty. She did them anyway. She said that it’s easier doing someone else’s dishes because you only need to do them once and then you don’t need to worry about watching them pile up again because you won’t be around by then. I also thanked her, but again I feel like I didn’t thank her enough. I’m not quite sure how I can, really.
Work has been a rather chaotic roller coaster. It was very, very busy during December and January, despite people telling me they were the slow months. So many customers wanting different things! It calmed down after February, though. Now, in April, I’m starting to get a little bit of down time to wiggle with. Especially now that I am more competent with how things run. The local “hard-ass” and I get along really well now. I’m well known as the office goof ball, which, I like. I admit, I like the attention, but I also like to see the smiles. I make plenty of lame jokes, and silly comments and they make everyone smile. I even get called a “Smart-ass” once in a while, but never at anyone else’s expense.
I still play World of Warcraft. It fills up a lot of my time, I admit. When I’m at home, I just don’t want to exist, really. It almost seems like I don’t exist when I’m alone. So I avoid it. I play WoW to be with people, even if it’s just an online connection. I like to laugh, I like to help, I like to participate in group activities. This is why I get behind in my chores, and why I forget to eat dinner nearly every night. I have only one decent meal a day now, my lunch break at work.
During my lunch break, I walk to the local breakfast diner. It’s a small little place with a small staff that now all say “hi” to me when I walk in. I’m always there alone for lunch. I order a few different dishes, but the same ones often enough that I usually never need a menu. Since my lunch is a whole hour, I take my time eating and then I pull out a book and read. It’s a nice escape from the hectic world of work, and the two ro three block walk is refreshing sometimes. It’s covered the whole way with a parking ramp so I don’t even need to worry about the snow in winter. (Though some patches can get icy from melting, and there’s a lot of pigeon poo.)
A good friend of mine from high school got in contact with me. She’s getting married to the man she moved away to live with. That was five or six years ago so it makes me happy that they’re still together. I’m to be the maid of honor, so I really hope I can get the time off to go. She linked me the dress she wants me to wear and it’s not overly pricy, but it’s still expensive. Thankfully the dress looks like it can be worn at other occasions as well. I do hope I can save enough to get the dress and to fly to the wedding. The gas prices are too high to drive. It’d actually be more expensive to drive!
My ex and I have been keeping in touch the whole time, usually about one phone call every week to every other week. I’ve missed him. Each time we talk it’s over an hour long, and we always have something to talk about. I admit, though that it’s usually him calling me and when I go to call him it’s usually to ask for help about computer things. I always feel like I need an excuse to call people.
He wants to get back together again. He came over to talk about it face to face even though I was barely getting over a horrible cold at the time. I warned him he’d catch it (and he did). With his pay, we wouldn’t be able to stay at my low income apartment, so we were looking for a place to move to together and he says that’s what scared him. Since then, though, he’s missed me too and he says he’s done some growing up. He is always a face value sort of person, so I honestly think I can trust him. I warned him that I’m still looking for long term, and that I haven’t changed in the least. All my little pesky habits around home are still there. Any reason about me that he left me for would still be there, but he still said he wanted to get back together.
Choir has been a bit of a drag lately though. The new director means well and is a lovely and enthusiastic woman. She has implemented this active way of practicing where quartets are required to sing a given song each practice night, and we rotate which quartets sing each night. This is nice, but it makes it very hard for many of the singers. Most of us are solo shy, and doing a quartet means we solo our own part. But even putting that aside, three out of the four parts of the choir only have four members in each part (or less!). This puts a lot of us on double duty for the quartets, and we end up singing every night because we’re in more than one quartet. It’s turned the rehearsals into “homework and testing” instead of getting together and practicing. They’re planning on a trip to
Also, work gave me health insurance. It works for emergencies but until I reach the $1,000 deductible, it doesn’t cover any of the day to day things. If I had the money to blow through the deductible I would, and then get all the other things I need covered. Unfortunately I don’t have the money, and even if I did, the things I need covered won’t be as there is a “pre-existing condition” clause in it where they won’t cover the conditions for another year. They’ll still cover me, but not my conditions.
I suppose that sums it all up since October. I just felt the need to put all this down somewhere. I feel like nothing is happening at all, yet when I put this all down, it looks like tons of things are happening. Perhaps I’m just a gossiper.