Its been a while since I have posted or been active here and I hope everyone is doing well. I have been in treatment and have definitely made progress but also still have a ways to go.
A while back I had bad BDD but it seemed to have subsided when my contamination fears took over. Yesterday something happened that has brought a bit of it back and I wanted to write for some help.
Basically this all started when because of my high dose of lexapro I started to clench my teeth at night. because of this I started to noticed my front tooth was getting little chips in it. I bought a mouth guard but then could not wear it because I was scared it was contaminated or that I wouldn't be able to sleep with it in. Anyway its been bothering me a little but yesterday I bit on a fork while eating and got a bit of a bigger chip. My bf said it is hardly noticeable but I can't stop thinking about. I feel scared to smile and go out because I fear I look hideous.
I am also feeling very mad at myself for biting down on the fork and not being more careful. I would go to the dentist and get it fixed but I am scared that I will then obsess about the change in the tooth.
As I am writing I realize this all sounds a little silly which might be a good thing that I realize this. Still any suggestions or thoughts? Thanks.
P.S I am also fearing that now I am a different person than I have been and so everything good that happened is now void. I feel like my relaitionship with my bf will now end because of this because I am not who he fell in love with.