I can’t sleep for more than a couple of hours a night. I can’t remember the last time I had a good night’s sleep. Depression is always with me, it’s never going away. I’m starting to hate the people in my life. I’m starting to hate life in general. My brother is one of the most selfish people I’ve ever met. He’s incapable of  caring about anyone other than himself. He never goes out of his way to do anything for anyone. Every time I try to talk to my parents about it, they dismiss it. I hate living with him, but it’s too expensive to move. I don’t talk to my parents about what I’m feeling because there’s no point. A former friend told me she values our friendship and I haven’t heard anything from her since. Someone who after I called her out said “yeah I know” yet does absolutely nothing to change. People don’t change, at least not for the better. Support groups don’t help, they’re just a waste of time. Sometimes I feel like lashing out at every single person that I know. I can’t fucking stand any of them. I wasted years of my life going to stupid fucking support groups trying to make friends only to be met with bullshit. No self-awareness, no empathy, no emotional intelligence. I no longer have to energy. Having depression is exhausting. Waking up to a dead-end job is slowly chipping away at my sanity. This is not where I wanted to be at all in my life. I have no one to talk to. I can’t remember the last time I was happy. I can’t remember if I was ever happy. No one cares. I’m tired of trying. Life is just one step forward three steps back. I hate not just my life but life in general. I’m on the verge of killing myself.