Even though I've been feeling much better lately, my nightmares grow worse and worse every night. Yesterday morning I woke myself up very early because I was choking on a scream that couldn't quite make its way out. I was freezing cold and yet drenched in my own sweat and my blankets were kicked all over the place. It's very weird because I've been feeling more rested lately and I actually have energy during the day, but there are still these frightening, vivid nightmares.
Here's the synopsis of one I had the other night:
I'm running through New York City as it burns to the ground around me, panicked and lost, when I hear the cries of infants coming from an abandoned hospital. I ran inside the burning building and as I ascended a flight of wooden steps, the cries turned into blood curdling shrieks of horror and pain. When I entered the nursery, I saw that all of the infants were on fire but one. Without wasting any time, I grabbed the baby girl and ran out of the building before it collapsed behind me. As I ran away from the city, my teeth started falling out and my insides wouldn't stop falling out of a hole in my chest. I looked down to make sure none of it was getting on the baby but when I did, the child had grown almost instantly into the ten-year-old version of myself, except it wasn't clothed, there were no eyes in the sockets, and the mouth was hanging open, slack jawed. Suddenly, I felt the spirit of my child self inside me, pushing everything in my body against the walls of my flesh, struggling to make room inside for itself.
And then I woke up. It might not sound as freaky in textual form, but these nightmares are absolutely horrifying to be inside. They're always physically dark- not necessarily night time- they just have a dark atmosphere. And for the record, I hate cities. They make me very anxious.
I've tried a few tips and tricks to induce good dreams, but none of them have stuck or worked for very long. Does anyone have something they might suggest? I'm desperate here.