School. Its already almost the end of freshman year for me. I am a band student and music is my only escape. My parents constantly tell me school will get better, your gonna make new friends, everyone goes through this too. I know my life isn’t bad, i have great parents and an awesome brother. However everywhere i go i constantly feel invisible. Summer starts at the end of next month and only one person knows me in my classes. I have had teachers mark me cut when i was in the class. I know i shouldn’t let this stuff go to my head but then everywhere i look everyone is surrounded by friends and being happy, when all i can do is listen to my music and hold back my tears. My parents say just try talking to someone new but i get scared around people. i have been trying soo hard to be happy at school but i always end up feeling lonely and stupid because i feel like i cant change it. I have one good friend and she had cancer and i know she has a hard time but sometimes i am even jealous of her because she is soo beautiful and outgoing. I want to be happy and i want help to be more outgoing but idk who to talk to people or explain how i feel. I guess you can say i have anxiety and i never eat at school my stomach and head always hurt i am always depressed at school. I constantly feel like am worthless empty water bottle just drifting away and sometimes even being kicked at. well i was able to tell my mom some of how i feel and she showed me this so i am new to all of this. if you read this blog please respond or something. because each day i feel more and more worthless.