And my mood is really quite spiteful… 🙂
Nah, I'm about to step out for my coffee/lunch break, but I have to share something first.
A short conversation with a sort-of-friend of mine got methinking about where I was, emotionally, a year ago versus today.
She mentioned today that she's sick of seeing "everyone" get ahead when she's the only one doing the real work. GIVE ME A BREAK!! She KNOWS that's not true!! But, it's the same crap I felt last year, when it seemed I was working harder than everyone else around me and no one noticed. My old boss S sure didn't seem to. Of course, I know now that he was as fried with his position as I was becoming with my own. So many times I would take on more and more work from my him… anything, just so he'd give me that one extra thank you… always giving and giving and then, predictably, becoming resentful when he seemingly didn't even notice. Sure, I have mitigating circumstances… management didn't really "get" how busy we were in construction. There were co-workers who really didn't want to help. There were a few times when, in particular, my old S boss was, well, kind of mean to me so I would just sit there, shut up, and do more work. But ultimately, as Tori Amos sings in a song, I was the one who raised myhand for the assignment. I was the onewho had to ask for help or quit complaining about howhard I was working.
I guess I don't really have a point to this post, other than tosaythatwhatever happens in 2011, I'm really glad I've had the last 9 months of2010 to get myheadout of my butt and start seeingeverything aroundme (including my own mistakes) more clearly. And I hope the same happens for my friend, at some point.
There. Now I can drink my coffee in peace. 🙂